My Glasses

In today's Issue

My Glasses
Spex
Random Joke
That's Amaaaaaaaaaaaaazing
Funny Fobia
The Thoughts of Chairman Anyhow
Finish with a Song

I wear glasses on my

Head

To see the traffic and not

get dead

I’ve worn them since I

Was small

Just after I could

Probably crawl

My myopic short

Sight

Is really quite

Shite

Coz I’m nearly blind,

I Should have a stick

And ignore the body

Politic

But I know my

Place

With glasses on my

Face

No Elton John,

No Michael Cain

That’s OK coz I hide

Behind these panes

So hide my pain

Within another

Under glass shyness

smothers

Spex

The first vision aid ever invented was called a reading stone, and was created around 1000 AD for the far-sighted. It was a glass sphere, and in a way, it acted somewhat like a magnifying glass. 

Glasses made their first appearance between 1285 and 1289, and were traditionally made out of quartz set into bone, metal or leather. They were initially created to help the elderly to read, but glasses arms hadn’t been invented yet – so they would always be slipping down your nose! The Spanish tried to fix ribbons to the frames so you could wrap them around your head, but this idea proved unpopular and soon died out.

In numerous African countries, the cost of eyeglasses can exceed the average person’s three months’ worth of salary.

In the past, many sailors believed that wearing gold earrings would improve your vision!

The first historical reference to sunglasses can be dated back to Ancient Rome and China. It was said that the notorious, bloodthirsty tyrant Emperor Nero would watch gladiator fights through polished gems.

Sunglasses in 12th century China (or possibly earlier) were created out of flat panes of smoky quartz, and were used by judges to hide their expressions when interrogating witnesses.

Squids have the biggest eyes in the world at approximately 18 inches in diameter. 

When they cry, babies younger than three months don’t produce tears.

In the first hours after a baby’s birth, they actually view the world upside down. Why? Their eyes project an inverted image onto the retina, as it takes time for the body to learn how to invert the image again so it can be viewed properly.

My boss arrived at work in a brand new Lamborghini. I said, 'Wow, that's an amazing car !!!' He replied, 'If you work hard, put all the hours in, and strive for excellence, i'll get another one next year !!!

A human will eat on average 70 assorted insects and 10 spiders while sleeping.... YUM

FUNNY FOBIA -

Globophobia ? - The fear of balloons popping !!

The Thoughts of Chairman Anyhow

In England, it's now mandatory for GPs to ask patients what their sexuality is. I think mine may have an inkling already, when I kissed him after my prostate exam.

Finish With a Song

This is TV Mogul Tracy Ullman with Sunglasses released in 1984