Hi, A little free story for your edification ..... Neville Raper Neville.raper@yahoo.co.uk

Red

By Neville Raper

Little Red Riding hood put on her hood which was, errrm, red.

Her father the woodman spoke “be careful in the woods it is full of beasties and monsters that would love to gobble up a little girl like you “

 

“I will pa pa “she responded in her best Red Riding Hood voice, “I will keep to the path all the way to grandma ma’s “

 

“That's a good girl, take the bread mother has made “

 

Red picked up the little basket of buns and cheerfully went in her way.

 

As she entered the dark deep woods fingers of chill ran down her spine. She heard every creak and groan of the bows around her. The tree tendrils strained and stretched as if to snatch up little Red. She was the splash of colour in a dark green world. She quietly whistled to herself as she skipped along, her melody masking the morbid moans of the misshapen forest. It moved in waves of wind flowing and ebbing around her, but still, she walked on.

 

She soon came across her Gran Ma Ma’s house, a beautiful cottage adorned in ivy and probably worth in excess of £550 thousand.

 

Red knocked on the door,

a soft shrill voice responded, “who is it?”

“Hello Gran Ma Ma, it's me, Little Red Riding Hood”

“Come in sweetheart”

 

Red entered the house Grand Ma Ma was laid on her sofa bed in her little front room. She was in her fluffy dressing gown with tiny pictures of sheep dancing around, Red was sure, if she counted them, she'd fall asleep.

 

“Hello Little Red,” Grand Ma Ma said “how lovely to see you, what have you got in your basket? “

“I have freshly baked bread that Ma-Ma has made”

 

“Ooo how nice, please put it on the side”

 

Little Red sat beside her Grandmother and studied her face carefully,

“My grandmother what big eyes you have”

 

“Do you think so Little Red? I suppose it's because I'm long-sighted, convex glasses do tend to magnify things, but thank you”

 

“My grandmother what big teeth you have”

 

“Thank you Little Red, I've just got these from the orthodontist, I'm quite pleased with them, I'm sure now I could eat anything, apart from toffees of course” Grand Ma Ma laughed.

 

“My grandma how hairy you are”

 

“Bit rude, but thank you for pointing it out, ladies of a certain age do tend to be a bit more hirsute, I will wax my top lip”

 

Little Red Riding Hood started to shiver, she studied Grandma even more intently,

“My My Grandmother what big claws you have”

 

“Claws dear? you mean my manicure,…….. “

 

Before she could finish Little Red Riding Hood jumped to her feet threw off her hood and threw back her head and screamed, “You're a wolf and you’ve eaten my Gran Ma Ma !”

 

“Pardon? “Said grandmother, just then the cottage for burst open, it rocked on its hinges, as in strode the massive manliness of the woodcutter. He whipped out his chopper and in one smooth motion deftly removed grandmother’s head.

 

“Well done Little Red Riding Hood, you've saved us from an evil beastie”

 

“Thank you Pa Pa, shall we split the inheritance? “

 

End