Hi all,

Many thanks yesterday contributor Anne Rhodes and thank you for your nice comments all. I will pass them on to Anne.

Today's piece is a complete change of pace & content.

The guest today is Sue McCartney, or as her alter ego, The Fowl Mouth Old Bird....

This is a fantastic piece of performance poetry all about.....washing your hands.

You will enjoy this !

WASH YOUR HANDS!  By The Fowl-mouthed old bird

Good evening ladies and gentleman this is a public service announcement.  Copies of this are to be found in gentleman’s toilets from the 2^nd of March

Just remember

You held your member

And how it lingers

Between your fingers

Please understand

That your cheesy gland

Harbours germs most bacterial

And horrors almost venereal

And never ever ethereal

And there’ll be music most funereal

IF YOU DON’T WASH YOUR HANDS

It’s never too posh

To give hands a wash

And don’t be a dope

Just slosh that soap

Now let’s talk terms

Just deal with those germs

Must you squeeze?

Your zits near my cheese

Must you sneeze?

Your oral faeces

Oh please oh please

WASH!  You walking disease

It’s enough to bring on pneumonia

A Saint would disown yer

Your bugs on my sarnie

And my chilli con carnie

With germs most titanic

You’re making me manic

JUST WASH YOUR BLEEDING HANDS

My stomach starts to quiver

My knees start to shiver

When you make me a cuppa

Or start to cook supper

Some guys have panache

And wash after a slash

But not you man

You’ve got ash pan

This poem’s confirming

That you need a worming

You’re deadlier than an isotope

Let me read your horoscope

Now please understand

That your gland

Harbours germs most bacterial

And horrors quite venereal. YOU’LL be hearing……

MUSIC MOST FUNEREAL IF YOU DON’T WASH YOUR F***ING HANDS. 

Brilliant !! well done Sue.... as usual, please comment via the contact box or e-mail neville.raper@gmail.com.

Also use this to send in your work...... go on....get your writing read !