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Showing posts with label #horrorscope #poetry #funny #comedy #plastic #trivia #thatsamazing #bargainbook #laugh. Show all posts
Showing posts with label #horrorscope #poetry #funny #comedy #plastic #trivia #thatsamazing #bargainbook #laugh. Show all posts

Sunday, 31 January 2021

Fantastic Plastic



Fantastic Plastic
Did you Know - Bags
Random Joke of the Day
Incredible Accurate Horoscopes
That's Amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing
Bargain Book
 



Fantastic Plastic

It's in our bottles 
Cup and dish
It's in the sea
and in the fish

It doesn't rot 
Or dissolve away
It'll outlive you
And your decay

A million years
They'll still be whole
Eaten by sealife
School and shoal

They'll choke the world
Suffocate the sea
All for our shopping
This deathly debris

Did You Know?..............Plastic Bag



Every second, 160,000 plastic bags are used around the world.

The amount of petroleum it takes to produce one plastic bag could drive a car 11 metres (36 ft).

A plastic bag is used for an average of 12 minutes.

267 different species of animals have been affected by marine debris.
If we joined all the plastic bags in the world together, they would circumnavigate the globe 4,200 times.

If just one person used recycled plastic bags over their lifetime, they would be removing 22,000 plastic bags from the environment.

Plastic bags are among the 12 items of debris most found in coastal clean-ups.


Random Joke of the Day


I spent all week erecting a new fence in my garden. My neighbour commented on my Facebook page that it wasn't straight so I unfriended him. That's the last time he comments on my posts!


This weeks Extremely Accurate Horoscopes With  Paul T Gyce

Hello, I've been expecting you. My name is Paul T Gyce I have been an astrologer to the stars for over 70 years which is a testament to my skills as I'm 55.

Sit back and wonder how accurate my predictions will be for you, this coming week !!

Aries March 21 – April 20


This week you will meet a tall dark handsome man, unfortunately, he doesn't 
like you.

Your lucky stone this week is Sharon.

Taurus April 21 – May 21


DUCK ! RIGHT NOW DUCK, QUICKLY...
Too late. 

Your lucky colour, now, is red


Gemini May 22 – June 21


Once again, being a Gemini you are in 2 minds, both are in agreement that
you need a haircut, but only on one head.

Lucky Animal - Push Me Pull Me

Cancer June 22 – July 23


MMMM........crab......

Lucky Sauce - Seafood



Leo July 24 – Aug 23


This week you will feel caged, Remember pride comes before a fall,
The mane thing is try to avoid puns.

Your Lucky Food is Zebra


Virgo Aug 24 – Sep 23


Virgo's are brilliant and this week everything will be brilliant because you are so great.
Everyone loves you and you deserve it. If you're not a Virgo... then tough.

Your lucky thing this week is every thing !!


Libra Sept 24 – Oct 23


Libra's are quite astute and will have probably, by now, worked out what star sign
I am. This week you will be asked to weigh something.

Lucky Clothing - A bra...



Scorpio Oct 24 – Nov 22


My ex was a Scorpio and I've never met a nice one. They are fundamentally evil people and will do everything in their power to make sure they get the house, car and your collection of "specialist" video's.... I mean what does she need with 48 video's on ermmmm my hobby. Well I tell you two can play that game, I'm keeping her underwear, It fits me better than her anyway.

Famous Scorpio's 
Crippin
Adolf Hitler
Vlad The Impaler
Danny La Rue


Sagittarius Nov 23 – Dec 22


Just what is a Sagittarius ? I mean I get the rest, animals, things, but this ??? nope.
Any ways, no idea what's going to happen to you as I have no idea what you are.... Oh, sometime this week you will breath.

Lucky Word - Meh !



Capricorn Dec 23 – Jan 20

This week, just like a goat you will over eat. Just try not to eat underwear some of that stuff is really expensive.

Lucky Saying - Who ate all the pies.
Lucky Number - 3.14159265359


Aquarius Jan 21 – Feb 19


By now I'm getting a bit tired, the spirits running through me are becoming dry. I need fluid, and ironically this is your sign. This week you will be rained on.


Lucky Fluid - Rain


Pisces Feb 20 – March 20

Why is it that Pisces is always last on the list, I mean it doesn't make any sense, the year begins with January so shouldn't it start with Capricorn ?
It's all barmy really, Anyways the constellation says that this week you will
find yourself in a room and forget why you went in there for in the first place. Don't worry you're not losing it, it's already gone.

Lucky Dating Site - Plenty Of Fish




That's Amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing

Eight of the ten largest statues in the world are of Buddah

Bargain Book
Did you get a kindle or e-book reader for Xmas? Then as a New Years gift from me you can now buy
my recent release, "Tales of the Unexpected" for the amazing low price of £1.99 (cheaper than a cup
of coffee) 



CHECK OUT THE 5 STAR REVIEWS -
B Silver
5.0 out of 5 starsGreat diverse short stories
28 October 2019
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
Love this writer I bought his previous books and in my opinion this is the best so far. The stories are much more diverse than the others. For a book of short stories there are a lot there, great to pop in and read as and when you want to. Read mine on the train, I laughed out loud at one point making my fellow passengers jump out of their seats. Recommended read....
YOU CAN FIND IT ON AMAZON NOW !