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Showing posts with label joke. Show all posts
Showing posts with label joke. Show all posts

Wednesday 20 September 2017

Colour




In Today's Issue

Colour by Martin Dixon
Colour
Trivial Top 10
Random Joke of the Day
That's Amaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing
Finish with a Song




Colour by Martin Dixon

Blue. 

The calm, the stillness, the cold. 
The isolation of a lack of passion, the flame quenched and momentum slowed. 
No joy can thrive among cold but there is beauty when allowed to coexist, tempering those too heated or irrational. A conscience, a second thought. 


Red.

The passion. 
The flame. 
An all encompassing vividness that ignites the senses and stirs every desire. 
Impulses to do, to say, to want. 
A heat that burns and fuels and enlivens. 
The zest, the zeal.

Purple. 

The opulence, the luxury, the regality. 
The melting comfort of extravagances and treats contained within.
The sinful, the instigator and accompaniment to private activities. 
The symbol of emperors and kings and artists on the cutting edge. 
A statement, a state of mind. 

Black. 

The nothing, the everything. 
The absence of and the abundance of. 
Comfort and fear among everything and nothing. 
The dark, the corrupt, the sullen, the shield. 
The blissful ignorance and the creeping dread. 

White. 

The purity of nothing. 
The gestalt, the sum of all. 
The brightness that reveals much and lengthens shadows, the veil, the mask. 
The spotlight, the glamour, the attention, the glare, the judgement. 
The cleanliness, the sterility, the professionalism, the healing. 
The "Good".







Colour


Scientists have found that for the perception of red colour corresponds to the X-chromosome. Therefore, women are much better than men in distinguishing shades of red. It also Recall that women have two X – chromosomes and males only one.


The best color for the car – silver. According to statistics, machine silver less often involved in accidents. This is due to the fact that they are clearly visible on the road and under twilight.

Feel the aggression and anxiety? Surround yourself with pink things. Pink has the property to calm the nerves.

According to a survey conducted in seventeen countries around the world, blue is the favorite color of forty percent of the population.

hromofobii. In this disease a person has a panic at the sight of brightly-colored or a certain shade of items.

In 2001, scientists studied nearly 200,000 galaxies, galactic brought the average color. It was called the “cosmic latte.”According to research by astronomers of our universe is beige and white in color.




The most popular colours on the Planet


10 Pink
9 White
8 Gold
7 Yellow
6 Orange
5 Black
4 Purple
3 Green
2 Red
1 Blue





When moths die do they hear a voice telling them to fly towards the light? 




Despite the terrible nature of and damage caused by the 1666 Great Fire of London, only 8 people were killed. This is despite the fire destroying at least 13,500 houses.


Finish with a Song

This is Colourblind - Darius Campbell released in 2002



Sunday 10 September 2017

Swap Ideas Day




In Today's Issue

Swap Ideas Day
My Ideas
Did you know? creative ideas
Random Joke of the Day
That's Amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing
Contribute



Swap Ideas Day

This is the day for us to share and swap ideas and concepts. 

Some ideas are practical some are more abstract, whatever they are they are great to share if only to check their effectiveness.

This site is a great place to share your writing work and ideas and I am more than happy to help you develop that work.

To contribute just use the contact button on the side.




Ideas

Ideas in my head
They bobble around
Mixed with pictures
Sights and sounds

I hear a phrase
I hear a word
I let them fly
My idea bird

A man walks past
in too tight genes
What's his story
Could it mean.....

A woman with 
an ugly dog
Think in digital
or analogue?

So I write them down
for later use
For they will be used
In something obtuse




Did you Know?  Creative Ideas

72% OF PEOPLE HAVE CREATIVE INSIGHTS IN THE SHOWER


THE INTROVERTS ARE ONTO SOMETHING: SOLITUDE IS WHERE CREATIVITY THRIVES


TRYING NEW THINGS MAKES YOU MORE CREATIVE


TRAUMA HAS HIDDEN CREATIVE PROPERTIES


DAYDREAMING IS SURPRISINGLY GOOD FOR YOUR BRAIN


SOME OF THE BEST IDEAS ARE WIDELY RIDICULED BEFORE THEY’RE REVERED





Random Joke of the Day

"I'm sorry," said the barman, "we don't serve time travellers." 

A time traveller walks into a bar.




99.9% of your DNA is identical to that of everyone else in the world.





So, if you've got some writing or poetry you'd like to share to a GLOBAL audience. 

Then submit via the side button. Get you work read !!

Go on, have a go...









Friday 8 September 2017

Junkie

In Today's Issue

Junkie by Anne Rhodes
Did you Know? Drugs
That's Amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing
Random Joke of the Day
Buy the Book
Finish with a Song





POEM -  JUNKIE???  ©  Anne Rhodes

I am a Junkie! Folk say I am hooked!
A paper-saver – with notes on each side
Printed, hand-written, wherever they looked
When touched each pile makes a paper landslide.

“Look it up again” their despairing cry
“Or file it neatly labelled in boxes”.
“That was the intention,” I give a sigh.
How to use Google adds to my stresses.

It’s better to print and read what I’ve got
To file stuff that’s important from the past.
To save stuff that later might mean a lot
Stuff that in theory I might need fast.

Granted that every flat surface is full
Of poems and stories and other work
Written when housework just doesn’t quite pull
Hobbies that create yet more paperwork!

Yet when I tidy it doesn’t get filed
I put it in carriers to make things neat.
No-one seems happy the way things are piled
How do folks manage this tidying feat?

Unshelved – unread - books all add to the mess.
Question is, really – why isn’t it done?
I should file more and type less I confess,

But without this stuff I couldn’t function!

Submissions

Lots of you have asked how you can submit your own work. Simply contact me via the contact buttons on the right and we'll take it from there. Remember this blog has a global audience of over
2,500 readers a week so this is a great opportunity to get your work out there and, more importantly...READ.

Go for it 





Drugs

1 – Drug addiction and abuse takes its toll on all  – Regardless of whether you struggle with addiction in a personal manner, the emotional and financial impact effect stems throughout every town and community.
2 – Drug addiction and abuse in American costs the taxpayers an average of $484 billion each year, £3.6 Billion in the UK. This number includes lost job wages, healthcare costs, crime, traffic accidents and associated costs of the criminal justice system.
3 – Drug addiction and abuse can be linked to at least ½ of all major crimes committed in the United States, in the UK it rises to 2/3.
4 – Nearly 2/3 of those found in addiction recovery centers report sexual or physical abuse as children. Studies show child abuse to be a major factor in later life drug addiction.
– A stimulant is a drug that provides users with added energy and contentment. Common stimulants include cocaine, amphetamines, nicotine and even caffeine, and can be quite addictive.
6 – Many drugs are addictive due to the chemical changes they impose on the brain. Brain chemistry affects how people act, feel and experience life in a general manner. By changing the equation, these substances can cause permanent harm and even psychosis.
– Any IV drug use increases the risk of HIV exponentially.
– Inhalants encompass an array of office and household products. Users will inhale the fumes emitted by these products to obtain a high. Common inhalants include paints, glues, gas and other chemicals. 
9 – Though a great many people tend to focus their attention on alcohol and illegal drug abuse, the most addictive drugs are often found in the medicine cabinet. Many people become addicted to medications prescribed by a licensed physician to treat chronic pain, anxiety or sleeplessness. Others steal medications from friends and family members or purchase them illegally.
10 – Though marijuana has garnered a reputation as a medicinal cure-all, the drug offers its fair share of side effects, including memory loss, learning issues, clumsiness, altered reality perceptions and increased heart rate. The THC found in marijuana works to inhibit brain function and can result in long-lasting effects even after a user has quit smoking.

There is a helpline for people in the UK who need help and advice about drugs its :

0300 888 3853

In the USA its ;

National 1-800 Crisis Hotline



98% of the DNA in your genes is exactly the same as a chimpanzee’s.


Polaroids. What Eskimos suffer from after sitting down
on the ice for too long.


By the Book

Sorry, blatant plug, but, if you like what you see on here and would like to see it translates into my writing please take a look on Amazon at my new book,

Tales of the Unaccepted


It's 8 short stories all with a twist.
There is an added bonus that, if you buy the book and leave a review, you will end up as a character in my next release due December 2017!



About the Author


Neville Raper invented You Tube, has swum the channel twice and is a habitual liar.
He lives in Yorkshire, where just like the locals, he says what he likes and likes what he says.
Broadcaster, Author, blogger, Neville is an occasional stand-up, and regular sit down.


Message from the Author.

Hi, thank you for buying this book unless you stole it, then shame on you.
Seriously, I hope you enjoy the stories within. A lot of people ask where I get the ideas from so I’ve taken the liberty of sharing the inspiration of each one. I hope that this may inspire you to write your own.
I’d like to say that this has been a long hard road to get to this point, but honestly, it hasn’t. I find writing a pleasure and having my work read a joy.
My ultimate goal is to write something that I would like to read and by doing so, hopefully, something you will enjoy reading as well.
So sit back, dim the lights, but not so much that you can’t read, and come with me on a journey.
These are all stories of ‘what if.' for isn’t that what life is all about?

Yours Forever
Neville


REVIEWS FOR TALES OF THE UNACCEPTED 

Top customer reviews

Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Loved it...a lot of the stories had a twist which I really enjoyed. I also enjoyed the sneak preview of the next book.....
Comment  Looking for voting buttons? Sorry, we don't let customers vote on their own reviews.
Format: Paperback
Sinister,humorous,witty,thought provoking and a real page turner. If you enjoy the unexpected then this book is for you. An excellent read.

Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
It was a pleasure to read this book. Neville Raper is clearly a genuinely funny man. His engaging and self-deprecating sense of humour runs through these stories, but this is a lot more than just a funny book. Some of these stories explore the dark side of life and have a powerful sting in the tail (and tale).
This is not run-of-the-mill fiction. It is different, quirky and original.
I enjoy Neville’s easy style. He says that he enjoys writing and it shows. He has a real way with words. He uses excellent imagery in these pages and reveals himself as an astute observer of mankind.
I look forward to reading more of the work of this very promising writer.

Finish with a Song

This is the Verve with The drugs don't work released in 1997



More Flash Poetry




In Today's Issue

More Flash Poetry
The Sea
Did you Know? ..... The Sea Side
Random Joke of the Day
That's Amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing
Finish with a Joke




Yesterday I showed you some "Flash Poetry" and I asked for your examples, Quick as a Wink, Here is Marjory Lacy with her work ( she currently on holiday....can you tell? )

The  Seaside.
Sea, sand, kids and dogs.
Ice cream, hot chocolate.
Pizza for tea.
Don’t want to go home!

Moon.
Moon, Oh! Moon,
Where are you tonight?
Behind the clouds,
Out of sight!

Seagulls.
Seagulls hover,
watch you eating
You can see
What they are thinking.

Sun/rain.
There’s the sun gone again.
The sky’s gone dull, quick RUN!
Here comes the rain, rain, rain!

Furry Animals.
Do you like furry animals?
That you can cuddle and love.
Stroking their backs and ears.
Looking into their bright eyes.
And if they have one - see tails wag.

Rainbow.
High in the sky a rainbow
Appears, so pretty after the rain.
Its bright arch has gold at its ends.


And one more from me .....


The sea is trying to tell me something
but it's drowned out




Did you Know?.......The Sea Side



The UK’s coastline is well over 6,000 kilometres long!


The tallest recorded sand castle is 12.59 m (41 ft 3.67 in) tall.


The first English ice cream recipe was published in 1718.

The tallest ice cream cone was 9ft

Sandy beaches are mostly made of silica (SiO2) in the form of the mineral quartz.

The longest beach in the world is arguably Praia do Cassino (Casino Beach) in the city of Rio Grande, Brazil. It is approximately 212 km (132mi) long.





What do you get if you cross a motorway with a fridge? Killed.




The oldest condoms ever found date back to the 1640s (they were found in a cesspit at Dudley Castle), and were made from animal and fish intestines.


Finish with a Song
This is the Beach Boys with Californian Girls release in 1966